Do you think there are people who wake up one morning and say, “I got it! I know what I want to do with my life! I want to be a celebrity umbrella holder!” Do you think they set up booths or tables at career day with signs festooned around saying “Apply for a glamorous career as umbrella holder to the stars!” Is there an agency where one has to go first to learn how to properly hold the umbrella so it doesn’t get in the way of photo ops? Clearly I’m in the wrong line of work.

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What do you think? Do we like John Travolta better with or without his wig?

Photos: DListed

Poor John Travolta. Where is he going to land his planes? The local airport can no longer accommodate his massive jets and Travolta is rather pissed. He claims he built his $7 million home where he did because he was assured access to the airport’s runway. See, the thing is, when Travolta moved in the runway was in good condition. He uses it quite often however, and it’s fallen into a state of disrepair. As a result, the airport no longer feels it’s safe for Travolta’s ginormous 707 to use the runway. Now Travolta is pissy because he won’t be home in time for dinner with his son.

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Once again they leave their autistic son home as if they’re afraid to be seen in public with him.

Oh that’s right. The Cult Church of Scientology doesn’t believe he’s autistic. Well if that’s the case, how come they don’t take him anywhere?

Travolta needs to work on hiding it a little better though.

So Scientology won’t allow him to tend to his autistic son, but they’ll allow him to wear a wig. Hey, at least we got our priorities straight!

Photo: D-listed